Acknowledgement

I've been thinking about eye contact lately.

I've been thinking about how eye contact is good.

I'm not just talking about eye contact with your children, your spouse, your parents, or your friends.  Although it is good to look those people in the eye too. I'm talking about eye contact with the "random" people you interact with throughout the day.  The cashiers at the grocery store or the coffee shop, the bank tellers, the staff at various offices, the people at the gym, the strangers on the sidewalk, those poor souls who work the customer service counters.

It is so easy to go through our day exchanging money, making purchases, placing orders, answering questions, checking-in, checking-out, and never actually acknowledging the people with whom we interact.  I get it, and I am guilty...we are tired and stressed, we have a lot on our mind, or a lot of children in our cart.  Acknowledgement takes effort.

In grad school I read a book on this topic called the The Life-Giving Gift of Acknowledgement by Michael Hyde.  The author's main idea is this:

          - Unacknowledged people can find themselves feeling isolated, marginalized, ignored, and
            forgotten.  Those feelings can lead to bad things.
          - The act of acknowledging is a communicative behavior that grants attention to others and
             makes room for them in our lives.
          - When people go out of their way to acknowledge the worthiness of another's existence,
            others feel wanted and needed and hopeful.
          - Offering positive acknowledgement is a moral thing to do.

Looking people in the eye is an easy way to acknowledge their presence on this planet.

Babies are really good at giving the gift of acknowledgement.  My baby in particular.  Abby has a smile, a wave, or a coy/flirty head turn for just about anyone we pass.  It seems so natural for her. If there is someone in her path, she acknowledges them.  When does that stop being natural?

My children's acknowledgement of the people we encounter throughout the day invites me into the connection also.  I am getting comfortable using my kids as the marvelous conversational ice-breakers that they are. And here is the thing, when I acknowledge someone else's presence by...looking them in the eye, or sincerely asking how their day is going, or saying an authentic "thank you" for their service...it makes me feel good.  I receive acknowledgement in return and the interaction is life-giving for me too.

Give someone the life-giving gift of acknowledgement today.
              And then do it again tomorrow...and the day after.  It may just become a habit.