The twenty-ten cousins

We are really excited today because our nephew/cousin John Jackson is coming to visit

...and he's bringing his mother (my sister) and father!

Jackson and Abby will always have a special bond because they are only 4 months apart.  

They were supposed to be 6 months apart.

Abby was born in April (7 lbs 7oz).
Jackson was due in October.
But Jackson decided to make his appearance in August

...at 32 weeks (4lbs 4 oz).

Here are Abby and Jackson last September.

In December.

And in June.

Watch out Abby, he is catching up.  

And at the rate we are going around here, 

I think Jackson could be walking before Abby too!

I surrender

About twice a year I raise the white flag...and I call house cleaners.

While many people (including my own mother) have tried to convince me that it is A-O-K to have a house cleaner on a regular basis, I am too stubborn or prideful to do so. Perhaps it is my Midwest-hardworking-British/Scandinavian roots.  Or maybe it is the fact that I am a recovering perfectionist and I'd rather do it myself.

Pride, heritage, and perfectionism aside, the fact is, the cleaning isn't getting done and I need some HELP.

I blame Abby.

This girl is as sweet as they get, but she is 15 months old, and she is generally up-to-no-good.   I feel like I have 15-30 second windows to look away from her.  If I go any longer than that Abby will be opening cabinet doors (we have been saying we need to baby-proof for about 5 months now), racing for the door to the bathroom in hope that the toilet seat will have been left open, putting objects in the dryer, or climbing on anything that looks climb-able.  I have trouble emptying the dishwasher with Abby around, let alone cleaning bathrooms and dusting.

Oh yeah, and I blame the dog too.  

Bailey is pretty much the perfect family pet, but she is a lab, and labs shed.  I can't even think about the irretrievable hours of my life that have been spent using a vacuum, swiffer, or broom to rid our home of dog hair.  I will say that Bailey's efforts to keep the floor under the high chair clean almost make up for the
                                                               shedding.  Almost.

Those of you with clean homes out there, I don't know how you do it, but seriously, share your secrets with me o.k.?  Or just come over to my house and show me.  You can use my place to demonstrate your methods. That is totally fine with me.

My goal for the week has been to clean up my house enough so that it can be cleaned.

I think Thursday is going to feel like Christmas.  Thank you in advance Naked Clean!

Not your mother's devotional...but a devotional for mothers.

We interrupt this blog to bring you a commercial break for this book...

Out of the Spin Cycle:  Devotions to Lighten Your Mother Load 

by Jen Hatmaker.

I have been given MANY devotional books over the years.  If you are unfamiliar with the term devotional, it is typically a short writing about a topic related to the Christian faith and life. Often devotionals are based on passages in the Bible and provide encouragement or challenging and inspiring thoughts.  It is a way to try to line up your day with God.

As a Mom I have found it very hard to spend any sort of consistent time in a devotional.  Many of the books I have (and used to enjoy before children) are either too deep and intense for my tired mind, or not short enough to be read in the brief moments between the shower and the pitter patter of little feet coming to say good morning.

Yet, I had no trouble at all reading this devotional.  In fact, I actually read all 40 chapters and I think I am going to start over and read them again.  This book is raw, real, and relatable. The entries are short and sweet, and most importantly, they are FUNNY.  Any piece of writing that can tackle reverent topics in an irreverent way is a book for me!  I like sarcasm.  Jen Hatmaker's sarcasm drew me closer to God.

Here are some chapter titles to pique your interest:
- I'm Perfect and My Kids Never Fight
- Seven Times in a Day (Of Course I'm Not Talking about Sex)
- Jesus the Magic Genie
- My Missing Inner Saint

Last time I checked, Out of the Spin Cycle was $9 on Amazon.  If you are a mother with young kids, or know a mother with young kids, get this book - you won't be sorry!

                                                                               .

Emmanuel's Gift

This week, I have had the privilege of hearing from and learning about Emmanuel Ofosu Yeboah.

All week long Emmanuel has been sharing his life and story with 700 kids and 300 volunteers participating in Kids Games at my church.  Second only to Jesus, Emmanuel has been a significant focus of the week at Kids Games.

Emmanuel's story is A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!  Click here to read his full story for yourself.

Highlights of his story include:  overcoming disability in a country that historically sees disability as a curse; riding a bike across Ghana with one leg in order to raise awareness about the abilities of the disabled; changing a nation's thinking and behavior toward the disabled; improving individual's lives through scholarships, wheelchairs, and compassion.

Emmanuel is a unique and incredible human being.  Kofi Annan, King Osagyfuo Amoatia Oforipanin II of Ghana, NIKE, the ESPYs, and Oprah think so too.  I felt honored to simply be in his presence. I feel grateful that my 4 year old has had the opportunity to cross paths with this man and his cause (even if she was too shy to say 'hello' to North County's newest celebrity).

The kids are doing a Car Wash and Bake Sale this week to raise money for St. Emmanuel's Gift Int. School, a school for disabled and abled children in Ghana.  This school is Emmanuel's dream and construction has already begun.  Awesome.

Here is a 2-minute trailer for a very good film about Emmanuel's inspiring life and story. We watched it last night. The film is called Emmanuel's Gift.  It is easy to find through Netflix or Amazon, and it is 1 hour and 20 minutes that may just change you (and your kids).

A few places to learn more about Emmanuel:

http://www.emmanuelsgift.com/

http://emmanuelsdream.org/
Pastor Mike's blog

For the father of my children on Father's Day...

I NEVER KNEW how comforting and peaceful it would feel to watch you nap with our newborns on your chest, or walk with our toddlers on your shoulders.

I NEVER KNEW how fun it would be to see you in the faces and personalities of our children.

I NEVER KNEW what it would mean to me to have you tell me I was beautiful in the last unglamorous weeks of pregnancy, on the days I gave birth, or throughout the post-partum weeks (okay, 9 months) when I didn't feel good about myself.

I NEVER KNEW how full my heart would feel seeing the way our girls look at you, and run/crawl to you when you come home from work.

I NEVER KNEW you'd be the kind of dad who would move meetings in order to walk your daughter to her last day of preschool.

I NEVER KNEW how much I would need and appreciate your energy, creativity, and patience...especially at 6:30pm after a loooooooong day.

I NEVER KNEW you would be so calm and strong during pregnancy and child related visits to the ER. 

I NEVER KNEW what a good sport you would be about letting your daughter dress you up in crowns, robes, and yes, even tutus.

I NEVER KNEW that 4 years of parenting with you would feel like a bigger adventure than every big adventure we had together in the 4.5 years before we had kids.

But I ALWAYS KNEW you were going to be an amazing father.

Happy Father's Day, Chris.


  
Special thanks (again) to our wonderful and talented friend Mark Kuroda 
for the family pictures he took during our visit earlier this year.

Lame-O

Confession time.  I am a pretty lame child sponsor.

I have sponsored a child through Compassion (Damaris Katuv Mitav) & World Vision (Juliet Mtawali Kapini) for years.  I can't remember how many, but somewhere in the realm of 5-8 years.

I send my $35 or so every month, but that is about it.

I have LOADS of opportunities to do more.  These fabulous organizations make it really easy.  As in so easy that all I have to do is 'SIGN HERE' and they will send a cute little Christmas or birthday greeting to my child.  They consistently send me stationary and implore me to jot down a few words that they will then send to Kenya on my behalf.

Yet I rarely do it.  See...I am LAME.

Sam helped me step up yesterday.  She saw and asked me about the cute little card and reminder that World Vision sent to me regarding Juliet's birthday coming up in October.  She wanted to send Juliet something.

So we did it, together.  We sent Juliet a few simple homemade crafts and cards for her birthday, and included a little extra money so World Vision could purchase her something she needs and give her a party.  

Lame-O no more.  At least for this week.

  

One of the best parts of our morning activity was that I talked with Sam about Juliet and Damaris, the precious Kenyan children who have been on our refrigerator every day of Samantha's life.  This time I think the conversation sunk in a little bit.

Sam wanted to call Juliet.  When I told her that Juliet didn't have a phone she said we should send her money to buy a phone.  I explained that our money is used for things she really needs like shoes, clothes, books, and school supplies.  I wonder what her little mind did with that information.

The ironic part about all of this is that I am always talking about how I miss Kenya, and I am always looking for ways to be a global and missional mom.

Maybe I should stop waiting for amazing opportunities with nonprofit organizations to fall into my lap, and I should start looking at my refrigerator a little more.  Sometimes the opportunities we are looking for are right in front of our faces.  Thanks for helping me to see that Samantha.  

...and Happy 9th Birthday Juliet (on October 10th)!

                                                                                          .

My first blog RANT...

I may be new to this whole blog thing, but I have read enough to know that blogs are a great place for a rant.

Here is a little rant regarding an airline...

Dear Delta Airlines,

Hi.  It's Emily.  Remember me?  Roanoke to Atlanta to San Diego on Sunday, June 12.

You might think this letter is concerning the delayed flight...or the missed connection...or the mechanical issue...or the person I spoke with on the phone in India who told me there was no way to get to San Diego and advised that I rebook to LA and rent a car (at 9:30pm with 2 small children)...or the person at the Customer Service line in Atlanta who honestly had less knowledge than I do about the inner-workings of airline travel (I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt that it was her first day or something).

No, no, this letter is not about those things.  This letter is about our baggage. The baggage we had to PAY YOU $25 a piece to take on the plane with us.

I'm the one with the FOUR pieces of "delayed" baggage.  Two red suitcases and two car seats. I'm the one who has called you every 6 hours since we returned home.

First, let me commend you on your wise choice of words in calling our baggage "delayed".  I get it.  The word "delayed" makes people feel better.  "Delayed" instills hope that the baggage is somewhere and it is on its way back to me. The problem is, I see right through your clever word choice.

You have been completely unable to locate our luggage.  No idea where it is at all.  I think that would qualify our baggage as LOST, or at least grossly misplaced. All you have been able to tell me is that our bags were checked in at the Roanoke airport.  Thank you, yes, I was there.

While your customer service people at Lindbergh Field and the baggage hot-line were helpful and friendly they were also totally unable to track down our luggage.  It was also really weird that one nice lady basically told me to keep calling the 1-800# about the missing bags because it was job security for her.  Hmmmm.  Happy to help???

We took matters into our own hands this morning and found a number for Roanoke airport because, we had a hunch.  After talking to a marvelous individual named Jim (who doesn't work for Delta), we were able to track our stuff down...in Los Angeles.  We located our bags ON OUR OWN and had to call and tell you where it was, give you the accurate claim numbers, and ask you to please get it back to us.

Supposedly our stuff will arrive sometime this evening.  Here's hoping!

I should also take this opportunity to say thank you.  Thank you for the loaner car seats. Without those we would have had to convince a friend to come pick us up at 10:30pm, or broken a number of laws in order to get our children home.

While I'm on the subject, I do find it interesting that you have loaner car seats. We were told they were previously unclaimed, but I have to wonder if the (really gross) car seats we brought our children home in were "delayed" long enough that someone just gave up. Even though I was quite thankful that you had car seats for us to use, I am eager to give you back your loaner car seats because I know all too well what can happen in a car seat.  And I know how hard they are to clean.

I also want to thank you for the new underwear, pjs, and toiletries.  I read the fine print that said we had up to $50 per day for expense reimbursements due to delayed baggage.  I read the fine print and I headed to Target.  I was almost out of shampoo and face soap anyway, and Sam was thrilled to pick out new undies and Hello Kitty jammies.  I grabbed some new pjs for me too.  I will be sending the receipt to you later this week.  Thanks.

We will be flying with you again later this summer, Delta.  Back to Atlanta actually.  I'm willing to give you another chance (because I have to), so let's do better next time huh?

Sincerely,
Emily, for seats 45D, E, F, and "lap" child


                                                                                  .

VA-TN-WV

We just returned from a wild and wonderful 10 day family adventure.

When we found out Chris had a cousin getting married in VA on June 3, and I had a cousin getting married three hours away in WV on June 11, we decided we should make a family vacation out of it and head east.  But what would we do for that week in between the weddings??? I looked at the map and saw that Nashville, where my sister Jenny and family live, is "only" an 8 hour drive.  There you have it...VA-TN-WV...that would be our trip!  

There is way too much to write about, so in keeping with my "Top 10" theme (for our day at Disneyland), here it is...

"Top 10" moments/memories/reflections from our BIG journey around the Southeast:

1.  Our stats:  18 hours in the car, 6 cities, 4 planes, 4 pieces of lost luggage, 4 random babysitters to make 3 date-nights possible, 3 states, 2 hotels, 2 weddings, 2 flexible kiddos, and 1 couple who now feel like we can do anything!  (I'm exhausted just writing that out.)

2. We had many "we're not in southern California anymore" moments, including (but certainly not limited to):  Concealed Weapons Class sign at the gun shop just down the street from the high school; being dive-bombed by the cicadas (who only emerge every 13 years) and stepping over their carcasses everywhere we went in Nashville; the HEAT and HUMIDITY glorious green grass and thick forests; $3.49 a gallon.

3.  Experiencing a true southern wedding in Lynchburg, VA where the ceremony took place on the tree-lined driveway of the bride's home...we were very thankful for the fans and tissues (used to wipe sweat from our faces).

4.  Visiting Thomas Jefferson's personal retreat, Poplar Forest, with our California family where Sam had one of her better falls (see video) and Abby crawled all over the floor of our forefather's house before we abandoned the
                                                     guided tour and made for our own personal retreat under
                                                     the shade of Jefferson's trees.

6. A fabulous double date in NASHVEGAS with sister Jenny and brother-in-law John.  Date included a steak house dinner, watching a few minutes of a Rascal Flatts music video being filmed, strolling down Broadway with crazy country fans in town for the CMAs, and enjoying live music at Layla's Bluegrass Inn.

5.  Lots of pool time to beat the heat in TN.  You know your kid is a daredevil when your husband has to say the following to an onlooking mom, "I know this looks like child abuse, but she is really enjoying it," in reference to Samantha asking to be thrown higher and higher, again and again, despite many face plants and belly flops.

7.  A 8+ hour drive and a 6+ hour drive went pretty well despite our portable DVD player quitting on us and the expensive adapter not doing its job to power it back up. Thank goodness for books, crafts, the radio, naps, snacks and "I spy."  A (mostly) good time was had by all.

8. My highlight...TUBING down the New River in West Virginia with my entire immediate family.  Think really really lazy river with a little rapid section at the end.  We even took our 14-month-old and her 9-month-old cousin down the river once (minus the rapids). They'd never let you do that in CA..or any other state!

GG and her son (my dad)
during the ceremony.

9.  Watching my precious, sharp, and feisty British born Grandma Gwen (aka "GG") spend time with her 5 great-grandchildren.  She is a wonderful Grandma and I love that my kids
      will have memories with her too.

10. Dancing the night away in Bluefield, WV with my immediate and extended family at my cousin Paige's WONDERFUL wedding. The last two times we have been to WV it has been for very difficult and sad gatherings, so it was wonderful to be there to celebrate together with my grandma, aunt, uncle, and cousins.


Despite the fact that our trip ended with a 17 hour journey home thanks to a delayed flight, a missed connection, lots of sitting on runways, really unhelpful people at Delta airlines, missing luggage and car seats (still missing and unaccounted for), and a slightly terrifying shuttle ride home at 11:30pm (2:30am body time), we had a WONDERFUL 10 days of being together, experiencing new places, enjoying family, taking in the beauty of our country, and celebrating marriages.

Straight from the shuttle to the living room...in our nasty loaner car seats courtesy of Delta.

A really fun bonus to the end of our trip was meeting up with Loise at the Roanoke airport.  

In 2001-2002 I was Loise's "dorm mom" at Rift Valley Academy in Kijabe, Kenya.  

It was so fun to see her all grown up and doing great almost 10 years later.  

Wow, I'm getting old.

Sisters and husbands...just cause I wanted to get this picture in here somewhere!

Beautiful vs. Fancy

I am not a big fan of the Disney princesses.

I actually tried my darnedest to keep my daughter from getting into the princess thing.  As you could probably guess, I failed...miserably (see Disneyland post for plenty of proof of this failure). While my husband and I successfully resisted buying princess paraphernalia (for a time), I did not account for the loving purchases of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and friends.  Before we knew it Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, and the like, were part of our lives and all over our home.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not against dressing up, being girly, pink, sparkles etc.  I love all of that.  What I am against is the consumerism vortex tied to Disney princesses (undies, toothbrushes, backpacks, socks, pjs, bowls, utensils etc. etc. etc.).  I am also against some of the messages the princesses are sending my daughter.

I have had three concerning interactions with Samantha thanks to Cinderella and her friends:

#1    A few months ago Sam started pulling one arm out of her dresses.  When I asked her about this she said "that is how the princesses have their dresses."  I looked around our house for proof, and sure enough, most of the Disney ladies have off-the-shoulder dresses (we will let Ariel slide on this one as she is a mermaid).  Gasp.  My 3 year old was already getting ideas about how to dress from media...and no, off-the-shoulder is not o.k. for my preschooler.  I thought I wouldn't have to deal with this until much, much later in her life.

#2    I told Sam she was funny one day and she said, "I don't want to be funny.  Princesses aren't funny."  Double gasp.  Ya know, she was right again.  A lot of the princesses are very serious and proper and well-mannered.  Those are fine qualities, but being funny is a really great characteristic too, and I don't want her thinking that princesses can't be goofy or get a laugh. Come to think of it, I liked the feisty-friend-to-animals-in-her-work-clothes Cinderella better than the silent-waving-from-the-carriage-in-the-blue-dress Cinderella.

#3 (this is the BIG one) Sam started saying that she wasn't beautiful when she wasn't wearing a fancy dress or costume.  HOLD THE TRAIN!  I sat down with her and started re-working her vocabulary in an effort to un-do what surely the Disney princesses had done to my daughter.  I told her clearly and seriously that she is beautiful NO MATTER WHAT she is wearing.  I told her she is beautiful when she is in grubby play clothes.  I told her that it is her eyes, and smile, and most importantly her heart that make her beautiful.  I told her that dresses and accessories make her fancy, not beautiful.

We do our best to make sure we tell her she looks fancy when she is all dolled up, and beautiful when we are talking about her darling face and loving heart.  All of this might seem over-dramatic (not that I have a propensity toward being dramatic!), but I happen to think words are really important.

If I can impart early in her impressionable little life that beauty should come from who you are and how God created you, I will do just that.

Here is where I am at with the Disney princesses:  I'm not kicking them out of my house, but I am keeping their subtle messages in check.

On a side note, a friend recently recommended a book called 

Cinderella Ate My Daughter: Dispatches from the Frontlines of the New Girlie-Girl Culture 

by Peggy Orenstein.  
I haven't read it yet, but plan to. 

http://peggyorenstein.com/books/cinderella.html