For the Love.

It is worth noting that this is my first post centered on WORDS and not pictures since this one in January 2014. Is it a coincidence that I actually WROTE SOME WORDS, and my kids started school (3rd, Kindergarten, and Preschool) in the same week? I THINK NOT. But I digress...

TODAY Jen Hatmaker's new book "For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards" released. I've already read this lovely book twice, and I'd love to tell you about it, and share how it impacted me, because I really think you will enjoy and be impacted by it too.

The book came out TODAY and you've already read it TWICE?, you might ask. How observant of you! Here's the scoop.

Back in March I saw an invite to be part of a Launch Team for Jen Hatmaker's new book, coming out in August. I applied and I got a spot on the team, which was a fun little gift for me at a time when I was feeling kind of low and useless as I often do during my bi-annual stay-at-home-mom identity crisis. This Launch Team is basically a brilliant marketing approach where 500 women (of 5,000 applicants) were given an opportunity to get an advanced copy of the book so we could read it, create some buzz, and spread the word.

Hmmmm, read a book by an author I really enjoy and tell people about it…well, that's an easy gig. I'm in.

I haven't read any of Jen Hatmaker's 6 older books, but I was introduced to her a few years ago through "Out of the Spin Cycle", then my life was ROCKED by "Interrupted" (my favorite of her books!), and I was challenged and inspired by "Seven" (her most well-known). I recently had the opportunity to hear Jen at a women's conference in Santa Barbara and I am definitely a fan of her writing and speaking. She has a deep faith, a passion for Jesus, a gift for writing, she is honest and thought-provoking, and most importantly, SHE IS FUNNY. If you can speak about deep stuff and make me laugh while doing it, I like you.

Here is a sampling of a few of my favorite chapters in For the Love:

- Chapter 3: On Calling and Haitian Moms. In this chapter she basically encourages us to BE ALL THERE (doesn't that sound familiar, Emily?). "You don't need to wait another day to figure out your calling. You're living it, dear one. Your gifts have a place right now, in the job you have, in your stage of life, with the people who surround you. Calling is virtually never big or famous work; that is rarely the way the kingdom comes. It shows up quietly, subversively, almost invisibly. Half the time, it is unplanned - just the stuff of life in which a precious human steps in, the good news personified." (pg. 21)

- Chapter 5: Run Your Race. This chapter really made an impact on me and has encouraged me to write again. Jen Hatmaker challenges the reader to reflect on what they love to do and what they are good at…and to do it. Her encouragement helped me to think about writing a little differently. I have always written for a purpose…for school, a letter intended to accomplish or express something, an article to submit…but I want to get back to writing simply because I love to write. People who love to take pictures, take pictures. Those who love to run (not me!), run. People who enjoy painting, paint. Well, I love writing. Writing helps me think, and process, and honestly, I find it fun and energizing. I know talk is cheap, and words are everywhere, but no one can write my words but me. I'm not going to wait for someone to ask me to write, or pay me to write, I'm just going to write. FOR THE LOVE of it. This blog seems like as good a place as any to start, so I have made a goal to get back to writing at least one post a month. Since I officially have two in all-day school, and two mornings a week with my littlest in preschool, this goal seems attainable once more. I'm excited. Thanks, Jen Hatmaker. 

- Chapter 9: Hope for Spicy Families. I need hope for my Spicy Family and I will re-read this chapter regularly…for encouragement like this…

- Chapter 11: Dear Kids. In this chapter she sums up her biggest hopes for her kids, which are truly the same as mine. "Be kind. Be you. Love Jesus."

- Chapter 12:  Marriage: Have Fun and Stuff. Advice in this chapter includes 10 helpful things she has learned in 20 years of marriage: "1. You are not good at the same things and this is okay. 2. I'm all for honesty,  but pretending has its place. 3. I'm all for pretending, but honesty has its place. 4. Find best couple friends. 5. Lighten up. 6. Be nice. 7. Stick together spiritually. 8. Stop trying to change each other. 9. Have fun. 10. Have lots of sex." Enough said.

- Chapter 25: Dear Christians, Please Stop Being Crappy. Just YES! to everything in this chapter. 

- Chapters 8, 14, 20 and 24: Thank You Notes. These chapters made me laugh to tears while sitting alone in Starbucks. (Crazy lady!) The chapters are full of simple and hilarious notes of appreciation to things like Amazon Prime, Maxi Dresses, Daylight Savings, Siri, Target, Autocorrect, Spanx, Dry Shampoo, Automatic Flushing Toilets, School Fund-raisers,  etc etc etc. You know…like on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. Here is what I'm talking about: "Thank you, Gym Childcare, for giving me the opportunity to watch TV, take a shower by myself, and drink a smoothie while reading a magazine. Oh! And work out too, but let's be honest, that's not the main reason I'm there. (And did I once check in my offspring, then scoot next door for sushi? Just let it go. YOU DON'T KNOW MY LIFE.) (p. 51)

- And then there is this little gem straight from Chapter 4: Fashion Concerns.

You guys, those are just a few of the 26 brief and delightful chapters that fill this book. Topics include: balance in life, pursuing your calling, marriage, school, kids, fashion, church, difficult people, turning forty, friendship, loving and serving others well. Honestly, reading this book is like sitting down to coffee with a friend. If Jen Hatmaker is already your friend, I guarantee you will love this read. If you don't know her yet, I think you will really like her after you spend time in this book, and then you will probably go on to read more of her stuff (may I recommend reading "Interrupted" next). 

Trust me. Get the book. Read it with a pen in hand. Be challenged, be encouraged, and LAUGH.

So there it is. I have read the book (twice), I have endorsed it (heavily), I bought a few copies and am excited for them to arrive today so I can start giving them away here and there. 

Launch little book, LAUNCH.

If you made it this far…thank you…also, first three people to comment get a free book from me. Ready, go.

My favorite endorsement:

"If Jimmy Fallon and Ann Voskamp birthed a literary love child they'd have to name it For the Love."

- Danielle Brower, wife, mom, lover of love, orphan advocate

For balls like me that DON'T bounce back very quickly...here's a great article!!

I don't "bounce back" after having babies. I ROLL. Ever sooooo slowly. Ever sooooo gradually. Back.

I get back (more or less) eventually, but historically it has been a time of frustration, impatience, and low self-esteem for me. I had hoped that this time would be different and that I would face this phase of STILL not feeling like myself more positively and with greater perspective than the last two times...but, so far, pessimism is trumping positivity and the road ahead seems long and daunting. I wish I didn't feel this way, but I do.

I'm working on my attitude though. There are some words from a Max Lucado devotional that I aspire to live by. Lucado writes, "I refuse to let what will rot rule the eternal."  These words remind me to try really hard not to spend my precious time and energy worrying about pounds and sizes and this physical body when I can and should be focusing on things that matter, eternal things, namely loving God and loving others.

All that to say reading this article made me feel much better and in much less of a hurry...maybe it will do the same for you, or someone you know. Pass it on.

The article is called, 10 Surprising Facts About "Bouncing Back" After Giving Birth
It was posted on Babble.com and is by Ceridwen Morris, a childbirth educator and author.

Here are the 10 surprising facts. Read the article for more info on each point.
I especially like and relate to #2 and #3 and #10.

1. After giving birth it's normal to look... pregnant.
2. Post-pregnancy weight loss varies tremendously.
3. Not every woman loses weight breastfeeding.
4. This is actually a time to eat more, not less.
5. Hitting the gym right away is not always a good idea.
6. Your core is weaker, but take caution with the crunches.
7. Exercise is great but making it happen can require some creativity on your part.
8. Posture takes a hit, but you can work on that...
9. Women crave foods while breastfeeding just like during pregnancy.
10. You don't have your post-baby body until you're... post-baby.

Again, here is the link to the very interesting an educational FULL ARTICLE .

And on that note, instead of doing crunches I'm going to go have a snack...like I'm supposed to!

Date Your Wife...you should buy this book!

Chris and I have this friend named Justin Buzzard...and he wrote a book...and we think that's really cool.

The three of us were Communication Studies majors at Westmont College, Justin and I worked together on a ministry team, he was Chris' roommate Junior year, and most importantly, Justin was in our wedding and Chris was in his. Justin is a great guy, a gifted communicator, and he just started a church in San Jose.

Back to the point of this post.

If you had told us in college that Justin was going to write a book, we wouldn't have been surprised...and we probably would have predicted that it would be a book about dating or marriage...and we would have been right, it's a book about both.

Without further ado:

Admittedly I haven't read it yet, and neither has Chris, but that is because it just came out. Justin's new book is NOW AVAILABLE on Amazon (for $8.54). I am going to buy a few copies today! You should too. Read it for your own marriage and buy one for a friend. I'm buying it for my husband :)

Book Description

Publication Date: June 8, 2012

An Intensely Practical Guide for Husbands Looking to Strengthen, Save, or Spice up Their Marriage
Most men don’t know how to date their wives. They did it before, but they’ve forgotten how, or they’re trying but it just doesn’t seem to be working. Justin Buzzard helps men re-learn this all-important skill from a position of security in the gospel of grace. As a father of three boys and husband to a very happy wife, Justin offers guys a helping hand, good news, and wise counsel, along with:

• 100 practical ideas for how to date your wife
• Action steps at the end of each chapter
• Personal stories and real-life examples

All types of marriages—good ones, mediocre ones, and bad ones—will experience a jumpstart as a result of hearing, believing, and living the message of Date Your Wife.

For a review of this book click here.

For more information/inspiration from Justin, check out his widely read blog.

And again, to buy his book just CLICK HERE.

Great post I read about empowering little girls that you should read too

I have two girls, but even if I had boys, I think I would be passionate about girls feeling good about themselves for the right reasons. I have written a couple posts about empowering my girls, one about beauty and one about what feminism means to me.

I was initially afraid of having girls (in part) because of issues like self-esteem, weight, body-image, beauty etc. I think I was mostly afraid of the responsibility that would fall on me as their mother to teach, model, and empower where these issue are concerned, especially since I fight battles of my own in some of these areas. I have since turned a corner and now see that responsibility as one of my highest callings as their mother - and I'm up for it.

Yesterday I read a really great post at Rage Against The Minivan that makes me feel more empowered as a mother of girls. The post is called tips for preventing eating disorders in children  If you have, or care about a little girl this is definitely worth a read.

These tips are short and sweet and memorable and spell S-M-I-L-E.   

S - slow     M - movies     I - individuals     L - love     E - empower

All of this originally came from a blog at Rewrite Beautiful. 

Here is a highlight of two of my favorite points...

S – Slow 
From birth through their teenage years children are sculpting their values by modeling the behavior of their parents and care givers. If children are exposed to complaints about weight, wrinkles or the way jeans fit, they are going to become concerned over the same things. Slow down before voicing insecurity’s around children. Let your child’s caregiver know that eating disorders are at an all-time high and you would like them on your team as a positive, confident role model for your child.

L – Love
Children mimic our conversations. We show children through our conversations with others, “I LOVE Tracey’s new hair!” and “I LOVE Chloe’s new car”. Making it equally important for us to verbalize what we “LOVE” about other people’s behavior. Children need to hear, “I LOVE how Jackie loves on her animals” Or “I LOVE how Jasmine donates her dental services to kids who don’t have a dentist.” When kids hear this dialogue they will try to fit the mold of your ‘LOVING’.

CLICK HERE to read all five points from the post. 

Picture from Rewrite Beautiful Website.

2 great parenting reads

An article and a blog post, both about parenting, came across my screen this week (as is the case most weeks). Both were passed on by mothers I love and respect. I found these reads thought-provoking, convicting, inspiring, and worth passing on.

I have included a little excerpt from each, with a link to the full piece. If you find the time to read these (they are both a bit long) you will be glad you found the time, and you may want to pass them on too.

#1 This first article is something worth considering - it's about current trends in parenting. 

Maybe less is more.

Welcome to the Age of Overparenting How I learned to let my kids be kids. 

By Katherine Ozment. Boston Magazine. 

Illustrations by Larry Ruppert.

...My heart sank. How times had changed. I still remember the time my two older brothers built an igloo in our front yard. It had a domed roof and arched entrance, and they strung an overhead work lamp from the ceiling and laid out a small rug so we could all sit in it for hours. Witnessing my children’s paltry fort-making skills, I thought, Is this what our kids will remember of winter — digging little holes in the snow as their mother hovered nearby? Where has the childhood I once knew gone?

In my nine years as a parent, I’ve followed the rules, protocols, and cultural cues that have promised to churn out well-rounded, happy, successful children. I’ve psychoanalyzed my kids’ behavior, supervised an avalanche of activities, and photo-documented their day-to-day existence as if I were a wildlife photographer on the Serengeti. I do my utmost to develop their minds and build up their confidence, while at the same time living with the constant low-level fear that bad things will happen to them. But lately, I’ve begun to wonder if, by becoming so attuned to their every need and so controlling of their every move, I’ve somehow played a small part in changing the very nature of their childhood. 

I know that if I continue on this path, not only will my kids never have the wherewithal to build an igloo after a snowstorm, they won’t even have the freedom or imagination to try. Watching them play halfheartedly in their meager little forts, I knew I had to change... Click here for full article

#2 And for those of us trying to keep Christ in Christmas...

Here is a strong, honest and counter-cultural blog post full of ideas for a more meaningful Christmas.

It is written by one of my favorite authors who I have mentioned on this blog before, here.

 The Christmas Conundrum 
by Jen Hatmaker

...What happened to Christmas? What on earth happened to it? When did it transform from something simple and beautiful to what it is now? How insidiously did the enemy work to slowly hijack Jesus' birth and hand it over on a silver platter to Big Marketing, tricking His own followers into financing the confiscation?

We all know it. We all feel it. Every year we bear this tension. Each December, the world feels off kilter. But in the absence of a better plan or an alternative rhythm or - let's just say it - courage, we feed the machine yet again, giving Jesus lip service while teaching our kids to ask Santa for whatever they want, because, you know, that's really what Christmas boils down to.

I just cannot take it anymore, y'all. I cannot.

What if a bunch of us pulled out of the system? What if we said something very radical and un-American, like: "Our family is going to celebrate Jesus this year in a manner worthy of a humble Savior who was born to two poor teenagers in a barn and yet still managed to rescue humanity."

I'm going to throw out some ideas for what I hope is a more meaningful Christmas; you may take some and leave some. Good reader, you may take none. Maybe you'll tweak an idea to fit your family. You might say, "For the love of Baby Jesus! She's ruining everything! We'll try one little thing this year, ok?! And then we'll quit reading her blog." Here goes... Click here for full post

Kids Books...10 of our Favorites

Ok, let's be honest...there are a lot of WEIRD kids books out there.

You know the kind. The ones you stumble through because the writing is cumbersome, or the kind where you close the back cover and think "what was that about?" or "what was the message there?" or "I need to screen these suckers before we bring them home from the library." Is it just me who has had this experience?

I recently heard a speaker at my MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group who spoke about the power and importance of stories. He emphasized that kids learn through stories, not lectures or speeches. We have all had the experience of learning something important through a story, and kids books are no exception.

In the spirit of giving gift suggestions, you can't go wrong with books, and here are 10 of our family favorites. These are books that have wonderful lessons to share, reinforce certain values, are fun to read, and many of them are beautifully illustrated as well.

Here we go...

#1 This is a great book for exposing kids to travel, adventure, and other countries, while also reinforcing that it is A-O-K to be a homebody and enjoy your humble abode and familiar surroundings.

#2  I seriously get choked up almost every time I read this (although, for me, that isn't saying much). This gorgeous book speaks to the fact that every child is unique, amazing, and one-of-a-kind. It makes a great baby gift too.

#3  LOVE this book! My girls enjoy seeing the faces of kids from all over the world and it helps introduce the the idea that even when we look different we have so much in common with each other. I've never seen this book in a store, but you can get it through Amazon or Compassion.

#4 The feminist in me loves this book. The thriftiness in me loves it too, because it is two books in one. The message here is that Mommies and Daddies can do the same things. Dads can sew and Moms can throw baseballs. Yes, indeed.

#5 A great book for introducing adoption. This book highlights China adoption, and is about a single mom.

#6 A touching story about giving and sharing and the reward of friendship that can come from doing so.

#7 This is the best kids book I have read that portrays life in another country, that country being Kenya. It is beautifully illustrated, has a different sort of African cadence, and teaches a few Swahili words too.

#8 This series is so great for keeping kids connected and familiar with special places for your family.

#9  Best kids Bible. Honestly, I think every adult also needs to read this book from cover to cover. It is a like a CliffNotes version of the Bible and can teach old and young alike that the Bible truly is one continuous love story, from start to finish. Think of it as The Message for kiddos.

#10  And in the spirit of the season, I don't think a more magical or beautiful Christmas tale will ever be written. I still get chills when I read it.

Never underestimate the power of stories.

Whether for your own family, or another, books are always a great gift. 

But not the weird ones.

Happy Christmas shopping. 

What is your favorite kids book?

Book recommendation: Heaven is For Real

While I slacked off and didn't read the book for my book club this month, I did finally pick up this book that my sister lent to me....mostly because I'm going to see her soon and she will want it back...and because the book is so, well, YELLOW, which doesn't let you to forget about it.

I ended up reading this book in 3 sittings over a 24 hour period.  I couldn't put it down.

One of those reading times started in a Starbucks, but I had to retreat to my car and drive to the parking lot of a nearby park...because I was WEEPING.  I mean WEEPING.

If you haven't already heard about this book, basically, it is about "a little boy's astounding story of his trip to heaven and back." For real.  Heaven.  There is probably a ton of skepticism and criticism circulating out there about the authenticity of this story, as I'm sure there is with any book related to this topic, or based on the testimony of children. As I read this book I used the same tool I was encouraged to use when reading research studies in grad school and asked myself, "Does this ring true?" For me, it did.  Is it Gospel truth? No. Is every detail accurately remembered?  I doubt it. But does it ring true?

The book is simply written and a fast read.  And it has been on the New York Times Best Sellers list for 35 weeks (if that fact lends any credibility for you).

If you are a skeptic, read before you criticize; that is the only fair thing to do.
If you are a doubter, give it a try and see what the book does for you.
If you are a believer, the content of this book will resonate.
If you have ever wondered what Jesus looks like, His picture is between pages 74 and 75. For real :)
If you have EVER had a miscarriage, you will feel hope. I did.
If you are an adult (I'm guessin' you are!), you will be moved by a child's simple account of the complex.
If you love a child, you will be encouraged to keep really loving that child, and other children too.
If you have ever lost anyone, you will be comforted.
If you have $10 and want to read it, click here and buy it...then pass it on.

Out of the mouths of babes.

A shout out for Book Club

Last night I went to BOOK CLUB.

I have been going to this book club for almost two years now.  My wonderful neighbor invited me when we first moved in.  I am so glad she did.

I love this book club because it has nothing to do with being a mother.  I love this book club because it is made up of a very diverse group of people.  Different ages, different stages, different racial and geographic backgrounds, different political and religious views. There is only one other woman with young kids in the group, but she is British, and doesn't go to my church, so even the two of us are "different" from each other.
It is so refreshing to spend one night a month with these great women.

I also love this book club because they let me come even when I haven't read the books.  Seriously, we are very accepting of members who haven't read the books.  I think last night was my third time this year freeloading on the conversation and the food.  Given that it is only July, my 2011 stats aren't great.

Have I mentioned that we have dinner together?  I love this book club because we always have great food and wine, which definitely helps in encouraging stimulating conversation...some of the time.  And some of the time we just bash the book, catch up on each other's drama, or talk about movies and current events.

Funny enough, we have even read some really good books at book club... Still Alice, Sarah's Key, and The Help. And there were a bunch of others that were just all right.  And a few that weren't all right at all.

My point is, I enjoy this book club for many reasons other than in addition to the books.  And that's A-O-K.

A sample of our recent books.  Want to borrow one?

Not your mother's devotional...but a devotional for mothers.

We interrupt this blog to bring you a commercial break for this book...

Out of the Spin Cycle:  Devotions to Lighten Your Mother Load 

by Jen Hatmaker.

I have been given MANY devotional books over the years.  If you are unfamiliar with the term devotional, it is typically a short writing about a topic related to the Christian faith and life. Often devotionals are based on passages in the Bible and provide encouragement or challenging and inspiring thoughts.  It is a way to try to line up your day with God.

As a Mom I have found it very hard to spend any sort of consistent time in a devotional.  Many of the books I have (and used to enjoy before children) are either too deep and intense for my tired mind, or not short enough to be read in the brief moments between the shower and the pitter patter of little feet coming to say good morning.

Yet, I had no trouble at all reading this devotional.  In fact, I actually read all 40 chapters and I think I am going to start over and read them again.  This book is raw, real, and relatable. The entries are short and sweet, and most importantly, they are FUNNY.  Any piece of writing that can tackle reverent topics in an irreverent way is a book for me!  I like sarcasm.  Jen Hatmaker's sarcasm drew me closer to God.

Here are some chapter titles to pique your interest:
- I'm Perfect and My Kids Never Fight
- Seven Times in a Day (Of Course I'm Not Talking about Sex)
- Jesus the Magic Genie
- My Missing Inner Saint

Last time I checked, Out of the Spin Cycle was $9 on Amazon.  If you are a mother with young kids, or know a mother with young kids, get this book - you won't be sorry!

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