Oh Africa

Oh Africa, Kenya to be more specific, you will always have a piece of my heart. 

I lived in Kenya with my family for a few months when I was 5 years old, and again for one year when I was 12. Then as an "adult" I lived and worked there for another year after college (Chris was there for most of that year). I will always have a longing in my heart to go back. I have had 4 invitations/opportunities to return to Africa (Kenya and South Africa) fall through for various reasons in the last 4 years. One of those opportunities was going to be in a few weeks (and with my dad) but this pregnancy side-tracked that trip for me. Someday I will get back, someday...

I am drawn into nostalgia by just about anything that reminds me of Kenya...eucalyptus trees, red soil, woven baskets, passion fruit juice, the smell of burning trash or tires (seriously), dangerous driving situations, and barefoot children with dusty dirty feet.

This weekend a person and a service opportunity helped connect me to a sweet time and place in my life.

On Saturday night a lovely Kenyan woman (Anne) who spoke to our MOPS group came over for dinner, along with another MOPS mom and her daughter. We talk and read about Africa a lot with our kids so it was really special to have a Kenyan woman in our home. Samantha promptly, and without prompting, got out all our African instruments and books about Kenya to show Anne. Anne enjoyed looking through the books and telling the kids about her beautiful country. In addition to the treat of getting to know Anne a little bit, the highlight of the night was the SAMOSAS that she made and brought to share. I probably had 7 that night, and shamelessly asked if she would leave the leftovers with us. She did. I won't even go into the hosting/cooking/tantrum disasters that made this NOT one of our best dinners, and instead try to remember the joy of talking about Kenya with Anne...and the samosas.

Then on Sunday I signed Samantha and I up for a food packing event hosted by Dream Dinners and promoted at my MOPS group.  Friends & Family Community Connection organized an event where 32,000 meals were packed in a matter of a few hours. These meals will be going to San Diego, Haiti and Tanzania. I thought this event would be a great opportunity to do something tangible with Sam for a country in Africa. Well...her attention lasted for about 10 minutes of our 60 minute shift. Lucky for her she found two of her favorite celebrity-status-middle-school-girls from church and ditched me for them while I continued to scoop protein flakes into the small plastic bags. In my daughter's eyes I am totally not cooler than a middle school girl...and I am totally OK with that...as long as those middle school girls babysit.

On the drive home I definitely questioned the worth of what I had done bringing Sam to this event with me. Did this make any sort of impact on her? Would she ever remember this? Did she have a clue what was going on, really? I don't know the answer to any of these questions, but I did conclude that it was definitely worth it.

My daughter has an awareness of the world, and an interest in Africa because little by little, throughout her whole life, we have talked about the continent, we pray for this part of the world, and we have pictures, books, and "artifacts" from Kenya around our home. Africa is a normal part of our conversation in our family. I believe THAT is how I instill interest, value, and excitement for something in my children. I live it out naturally in front of, and with, them.

For me it comes down to this... If there is an opportunity to invite a Kenyan woman into our home, I will take it. If there is a chance to spend an hour packing food to go to Tanzania with my preschooler, I will sign up. If there is a news story about a country in Africa, I will draw their attention to it. If our church hands out Love Loaves from World Vision, we will participate. If Uncle Jeff or Papa have recently traveled somewhere in Africa for work, we will listen to their stories. And when an opportunity comes to take our family back to Kenya someday (please God, please!), we will go. All of this, after all, is exactly what my parents did with me.

Oh Africa, you have made an indelible mark on my heart. 
And now my heart is to pass that mark on to my children.

Mormor (that's Swedish for Grandma) and Papa's visit

Well, a more accurate way to put it would be Papa and Papa's visit since Abby has decided it is easier to call all her grandparents Papa right now. It took my mom awhile to realize she needed to answer to Papa. I'm sure Abby's language will catch up and she will sort out the right names, but for now here she is with Papa, Papa, Papa, and Papa. The girls had a really special few hours with ALL FOUR of their amazing grandparents at the start of my parents' visit.

I'm going to give my dad the benefit of the doubt and assume he was saying "cheese" in this picture.

This is the second year that my parents have come out for a week in March thanks to a medical conference hosted in the San Diego area. In keeping with other posts where there is too much to write about I will share my...

TOP 10 from my parents' visit:

#1 Enjoying Del Mar and my parents' lovely hotel. Thanks to my Dad's work footing the bill my parents stayed in a really nice place for the first 4 nights of their trip...not that they don't love our futon. Papa and Mormor are a little obsessed with Del Mar...the restaurants, the shops, the parks, the views. Who can blame them? It is a great little town. Here are Abby and "Papa" at Smashburger...

#2 The swimming pool at the hotel. The girls loved the swimming pool even though it was only 60 degrees outside and mostly cloudy. The adults were COLD and enjoyed the hot tub more.

#3 San Diego Zoo. Highlight for adults = enjoying the amazing landscaping at the zoo. Even if there were no animals the San Diego Zoo would be worth the ticket price (well, almost) as a botanical garden. Highlight for the girls = the souvenir pennies.

#4 Restaurants and Dr. appointments are so much (EASIER!) more fun with Mormor and Papa there.

#5 Ferry boat ride from San Diego Harbor to Coronado Island for the morning. What a fun family outing! Chris missed this day due to an inconvenience called "work" but we will definitely be doing it again with him. It is a short and scenic 20 minute ride through the harbor and the boat drops you off in a fun little section of the island with shops, restaurants, a boardwalk, beachfront, and bike rentals nearby (but you can also bring your own on the ferry). Who wants to join us next time?

#6 Fun times around our house including playing with Papa's very popular iPad, a St Patrick's Day green breakfast, and romping in the rain (see Mom and Dad, it DOES rain in San Diego).

#7 A little hike with a BIG view at Torrey Pines State Park. Look at Abby go.

#8 Double date at Kitchen 1540 in Del Mar (where else?). Although we definitely weren't cool enough for this restaurant they let us eat here anyway. The menu and ambiance at this restaurant are top notch.

#9 Mormor (aka Papa) was able to stay for 4 extra days which meant cooking, crafts, and new costumes.

#10 Grandparent/Grand-daughter time. The highlight of time with my parents is always simply watching my girls with them. How I wish we lived closer...but considering the geography, we do really well with how often we see each other.

We look forward to seeing Mormor and Papa again very soon in "the happiest place on earth"!

Celebrating our 10th year, Catalina Island

When we got married in October 2002 we honeymooned in Italy and Switzerland and at the time we told ourselves we would return to Europe for our 10 year anniversary. But alas, year 10 finds us with two children, one on the way, a mortgage, and a job. No Europe this year.

So for awhile we talked about a "plan B"... Hawaii. But then we got pregnant, and I don't want to go to Hawaii pregnant.  Big belly on the beach, no wine, no sushi, no energy...not to mention not enough frequent flyer miles or vacation days. No Hawaii.

So instead of Europe or Hawaii we decided on Catalina Island for 2 days. Yes, it was a huge downgrade from our original anniversary intentions, but it was a much needed getaway and celebration nonetheless. Not to mention that it was a FREE trip thanks to the fact that we listened to a time-share sales pitch back in October. And the best part of a free trip is that we get to have a Part 2 to our 10 year celebration...a Coldplay show at the Hollywood Bowl in May (woot woot!).

So back to Catalina. It was lovely. It was 55 hours (well 54 thanks to Daylight Savings) of relaxation, no agenda, and remembering what it was like to be just the two of us. THANK YOU Grandma Janet and Grandpa Bob for making this trip possible by spending the weekend with your grand-daughters!!!

We started the trip by going to Newport Beach Friday night so we could catch the boat to Catalina early the next morning. Our room wasn't too shabby and had quite a view...

Saturday morning we took a lovely 60 minute ride on this boat to Catalina Island.

Catalina is 22 miles by 8 miles, has ONE little town (population 3,500) and sits 22 miles off the coast.
It is BEAUTIFUL, peaceful, and for being so close to home it makes you feel like you are far away, in another country even - which is exactly what we needed - to feel away. This sleepy little island has no big chain businesses (no Starbucks even), no big hotels, and hardly any cars (people drive golf carts).

It was the perfect choice for our weekend.

When we originally chose this weekend for our trip we didn't think I would be pregnant so some of our plans had to be changed. Instead of zip-lines and off-road bumpy back country touring we took a more mellow approach and did a lot of walking and eating. 

Renting a golf cart for 3 hours was a highlight for me and a MUST if you ever go to Catalina. 

You can see the whole island in about an hour. 

A glass bottom boat tour was included in our vacation package. 

We also caught a movie at the historic theater on the island where an organist does a concert on the theater's organ for the hour before the movie.

We hiked a bit and saw where the Chicago Cubs used to have spring training (who knew???) thanks to Mr. Wrigley who was a very important person in establishing Catalina.
Always love a Chicago connection!

 But mostly this trip was about these two people.

It was incredible just to BE together.
Three days with no plans, no hurry, no one to take care of, no distractions. Three days of EYE CONTACT.
Year 10 is already shaping up to be one of our best!

We will be back to Catalina again I hope. It MAJORLY exceeded my expectations.

Hey ME (and maybe you)...listen up!

When I was at a college homecoming/reunion this past October I wrote a post about what I would have said to my college self. The problem with that post is that I won't ever be college student again, so my great advice doesn't really  help me.

I have been thinking recently about what I want to remind myself of regarding other phases or states of life I have already been through, and will go through (or am currently in) again.  So here we go. Maybe some of these will resonate with and encourage you too.

Hey Emily...LISTEN UP!!!!

When you have a 3 year old... It's the worst age, really the worst. But just remember that Samantha at age 3 was an entirely different person than at age 4. The child who you seriously considered enrolling in multiple preschools just to have more breaks from her turned into the child you are really sad will be going to Kindergarten next year. This too shall pass.

When you are 18 weeks pregnant (and every week before and after that point)...There was nothing you could have done to cause or prevent the loss of your baby at 18 weeks. Remember that. There is nothing you can do now to cause or prevent another pregnancy loss. Rest in the fact that we are not in control. Rest in the One that is.

When you are post-partum and can't lose weight as fast as you would like...You did it twice, and you will do it again. It might take 12+ months, but it will come off.  Give yourself grace. It takes you a long time, but in the long run who really cares if you have a few months of chubby pictures and tight clothes to show for it. Focus on that sweet baby. And remember, this time when you lose the weight it will be for keeps!

When your house is a disaster...Some day the kids will be at school, or out of the house for good, and the house will be spotless...and sooooo quiet...waaaay too quiet. When the day comes that you can actually keep the house clean, you might miss the days of a messy house and the baby/toddler/preschool years responsible for that mess.  The mess means you have little ones who live and play in your home all day long, and that's a good thing. Try not to let it get to you so much.

When you are tired...like every day...take a nap whenever possible. Seriously. Let the house go and NAP! And go to bed earlier. Things seem overwhelming after 9 or 10pm, so call it a day and start fresh the next morning.

When you question your sanity or what the heck you are doing everyday...Read this post you wrote about being a stay-at-home-mom.

When you question if you are doing enough, if you are good enough as a mother...Read this awesome post someone else wrote and forget trying to carpe every diem, just try to carpe a few minutes each day, or a day or two each week. You love those children fiercely, and that is the best and the most you can do for them.

What would you like to say to yourself?  Try writing it down somewhere, it is quite liberating. 

Great post I read about empowering little girls that you should read too

I have two girls, but even if I had boys, I think I would be passionate about girls feeling good about themselves for the right reasons. I have written a couple posts about empowering my girls, one about beauty and one about what feminism means to me.

I was initially afraid of having girls (in part) because of issues like self-esteem, weight, body-image, beauty etc. I think I was mostly afraid of the responsibility that would fall on me as their mother to teach, model, and empower where these issue are concerned, especially since I fight battles of my own in some of these areas. I have since turned a corner and now see that responsibility as one of my highest callings as their mother - and I'm up for it.

Yesterday I read a really great post at Rage Against The Minivan that makes me feel more empowered as a mother of girls. The post is called tips for preventing eating disorders in children  If you have, or care about a little girl this is definitely worth a read.

These tips are short and sweet and memorable and spell S-M-I-L-E.   

S - slow     M - movies     I - individuals     L - love     E - empower

All of this originally came from a blog at Rewrite Beautiful. 

Here is a highlight of two of my favorite points...

S – Slow 
From birth through their teenage years children are sculpting their values by modeling the behavior of their parents and care givers. If children are exposed to complaints about weight, wrinkles or the way jeans fit, they are going to become concerned over the same things. Slow down before voicing insecurity’s around children. Let your child’s caregiver know that eating disorders are at an all-time high and you would like them on your team as a positive, confident role model for your child.

L – Love
Children mimic our conversations. We show children through our conversations with others, “I LOVE Tracey’s new hair!” and “I LOVE Chloe’s new car”. Making it equally important for us to verbalize what we “LOVE” about other people’s behavior. Children need to hear, “I LOVE how Jackie loves on her animals” Or “I LOVE how Jasmine donates her dental services to kids who don’t have a dentist.” When kids hear this dialogue they will try to fit the mold of your ‘LOVING’.

CLICK HERE to read all five points from the post. 

Picture from Rewrite Beautiful Website.