If you haven't heard the term 'doula' before, I'll start with a couple definitions...
a non-medical assistant who provides physical, emotional and
informational support in prenatal care, during childbirth and during the
postpartum period
a labor companion who is trained and experienced in
childbirth, and provides continuous physical and emotional support during labor,
birth, and the immediate postpartum period
When I first heard about doulas I thought it sounded really "new-agey" and pictured a woman with dreadlocks and crystals and drums in the delivery room with us (which probably has happened, but isn't exactly my style). But, as I looked into it I realized that having a doula present at childbirth actually goes waaaaaaaaaay back, like all the way back (have you read The Red Tent?), and is just a fancy term for what happens around the world everyday. A doula is simply a female helper for labor and childbirth. Doulas come in a variety of "styles."
Doulas are usually (but not always) associated with natural childbirth and that is indeed why I wanted to hire a doula for my first child's birth...I wanted to do it naturally.
Now before you get the wrong idea about me let me say that I didn't have a goal to have a nautral birth because I am an earth mother, a hero, or love pain. No, no. I wanted a natural childbirth because the REALLY big needle that goes in the spine scared me way more than the pain...and because I am a control freak who can't stand the thought of not being able to feel parts of my body during labor and delivery. Those of you who get the epidural...YOU are the brave ones...more power to you :)
Here are a few more reasons I choose to have a doula...
1. I didn't like the idea that my labor and delivery nurse would be a crapshoot (whoever happened to be on duty). I was worried about not clicking with the nurse, or that the nurse would have to change shifts or check on other patients or have hospital procedures/protocol competing with her attention to me. I wanted at least one familiar face (who knew what they were doing) in that delivery room with us.
2. My dear sweet husband wasn't going to have a clue how to help me through labor, so I wanted to take the pressure off of both of us for him to do a "good job". In the end Chris always does great supporting me, partly because he is able to follow the lead and expertise of the doula. Doulas don't replace husbands, they just make them look good. He would tell you he has been as grateful to have a doula present for the births of our children as I have been.
3. Since my goal was a natural childbirth I wanted someone helping me who wasn't going to suggest an epidural too quickly, even when things got crazy. The first time, we established a "three strikes" policy together meaning if I asked for an epidural 3 times the doula would inform the nurse, but the first two times she would try to help me keep going. Turns out my kids are born so fast I didn't even have time to ask once.
I cannot overstate the emotional and mental difference it makes for me (and my husband) to have a doula with us for the birth of our children. It takes a lot of stress out of the birth and gives me great peace of mind. Doctors and nurses and hospitals are wonderful and totally essential (for me), but I have loved having an extra trained professional during labor who is there to focus totally on me.
