So, yes, I did Monday through Friday on my own last week...and I lived to tell about it...and so did the children. It wasn't pretty, but I didn't really expect it to be.
Sam is in Kindergarten which is great for her, she loves it. I thought it was going to be great for me to have her in school, but it is less great than I thought. For starters, I miss her. I miss her and I miss her help. She has been wonderful with baby Hannah and super helpful to me, fetching me whatever I need while I feed Hannah. But mostly Sam has been REALLY helpful with Abby because she gives Abby someone to play with/pester/follow/entertain. 2 year old little sister is MAJORLY BUMMED that Sam is gone every day.
Abby. This brings me to Abby. If you had asked me in the first two weeks how Abby was adjusting to being a big sister I would have told you (and I did tell some of you) she was doing FINE, no big deal. I would have theorized for you that perhaps baby Hannah isn't a big deal for Abby because, well, as the second child Abby has always shared our attention, and she's only 2 so she's This week as I tried out 3 kids on my own Abby decided to tell me what she really thought about all this change in our household. And she told me in mascara. Allow me to explain.
Abby was really NAUGHTY all week. Lots of meltdowns. Lots of timeouts. Very little cooperating or listening. Oh, and lots of TV. Every time I sit to nurse Hannah I turn on a show for Abby in an attempt to keep her close to me since Abby is not to be trusted out of my sight (example forthcoming). I believe this newborn feeding schedule may just drive Abby to hate Curious George after all is said and done.
And while I am on the subject of nursing let me just warn you that should you interact with Abby for any length of time she will probably tell you that you have boobs. Yep, she is quite intrigued with anatomy right now. Male or female, she likes to point out boobs. Male or female, she thinks everyone has them.
So let me tell you about Thursday. Not a great day. This was a VERY fussy day for Hannah where I had to hold her most of the day to keep her happy. The house was a total disaster, and Mommy was kind of a disaster too. Turns out Hannah has a sensitive tummy and I have had to cut out dairy and caffeine. How cruel is that? No coffee and no ice cream. Two of my favorite coping mechanisms GONE. Sad sad for me. Well, tired decaffeinated mommy holding baby sister all morning brought out the worst in poor Abby on Thursday. I lost track of the timeouts. At one point the bottom step wasn't enough and I had to put Abby in a major timeout (in her crib) for a major offense (swatting at mom).
I went upstairs to get Abby out of her timeout while Hannah slept on the couch (thrilled to have her sleeping not in my arms for a few minutes). After the post-timeout-talk with Abby Hannah started crying. I don't know what I was thinking but I left Abby upstairs and went down to quickly get Hannah to bring her up with me. I mean what could happen in that amount of time??? While getting Hannah I decided to change the clothes from washer to dryer so as to make a small amount of progress on the mountain of laundry that was spilling into the family room.
3 minutes. 4 minutes tops. That's it, and I was back upstairs.
Abby certainly wasn't where I'd left her. I found Abby in my bathroom. And I found her painting the mirror, her face, and THE CARPET with my mascara. AHHHHHH! I couldn't laugh or cry...too tired for either of those. I wanted to take a picture, but I feared that would send the wrong message. I was mad. I was also ever so slightly impressed with her fine motor skills and creativity. Back to timeout for Abby.
As I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed the mascara off the recently cleaned carpet I questioned two things. 1. WHY did they think carpet in bathrooms was a good idea in the 80s!?!? and 2. What was Abby trying to write with that mascara?
I couldn't help but think that Abby was sending me a message via Maybelline Full N' Soft. I sensed there was a four letter word written in there somewhere. Whatever the message actually was, I got the gist. The message was something about not being pleased with all that is going on around here, wishing Mommy would give her a little more attention, wanting Sam home from school, and being really mad that Daddy went back to work and the grandparents were nowhere to be seen. Poor Abby. Scrub, scrub, scrub. Poor Mommy. Scrub, scrub, scrub. Poor carpet. Scrub, scrub, scrub.
I hugged Abby tight when I got her out of her timeout. I tried to give her more attention the rest of the day. I even rocked her in the rocking chair and sang some songs with her. I did my best to be sensitive to what she was going through with this monumental change in our family.
And then I signed her up for an extra morning of preschool.
Perhaps that is what was written in mascara...please, for the love, let me go to school one more day, it's waaaaay more fun there than it is here!
So yes, I am adjusting to my new normal one day at a time. I never pictured having three kids ages 5 and under. Before surprise! baby Hannah I was pretty confident that adequate space between children was the key to maternal sanity. Now I am sure of it.
Chris keeps telling me to re-set my baseline and get comfortable with chaos. To which I usually respond...but I thought it was already pretty chaotic before Hannah came along. Like I said, I am getting used to my new chaotic normal. And truly, deep down, I am also loving and appreciating every blessed chaotic second of it. Although, I will admit, it would be soooo much easier to love and appreciate it all if I could have coffee.
